The French Surrender Again… to Parenthood?
French author Corinne Maier has written a book called No Kid: 40 Reasons Not to Have Children
“The child has become so vested with importance, such a huge burden requiring so many changes to one’s way of life that having one has become inhumane, so my advice to people is don’t have any,” says Maier.
Here are 20 of her reasons:
— Childbirth is torture
— You will become a mobile feeding bottle
— You will struggle to continue having fun yourself
— You will lose touch with your friends
— You will have to learn a language of idiots to communicate with your children
— Your children will kill your desire
— Children sound the death knell of the couple
— Having children is conformist
— Children are expensive
— You will be duped into thinking that there is such a thing as a perfect child
— You will inevitably be disappointed by your own child
— You will be expected to be a mother before you are a professional and a woman
— Families are a nightmare
— Children will put the seal on your childhood dreams
— You can’t stop yourself wanting complete happiness for your progeny
— Staying at home to look after children is breathtakingly dull
— You have to choose between motherhood and professional success
— When a child appears, the father disappears
— There are already too many children on the planet. Times Online Article
Commentary: Parenting is not easy. Slackers need not apply. Parenting is likely the single greatest personal challenge possible. It takes a tremendous investment of emotions, time, energy, and resources. And I never really appreciated what my parents had done for me until my 20’s when I became a Dad. Raising the next generation is no small task, but you can do it! And to absentee husbands and fathers: your family desparately needs you–your love & leadership! Parenting is your opportunity to shape the world.
Never! Never! Never surrender!
Old Ford Road 
Great title! Wow, how do you parody something so ridiculous? She’ll wake up one day and realize what she missed.
Thanks Neil. You said it–she’ll really regret pursuing her own selfishness someday. She doesn’t seem to recognize that her parents likely sacrificed a great deal to raise her. Her view of life is so short-sighted and sad.
Why is it that when ONE person writes a book, we say it’s the French?
The author sounds like a militant feminist to me. Raising a child is the most important thing an adult can do. We don’t need someone like her raising a child anyway.
“You will be expected to be a mother before you are a professional and a woman”
Most mothers don’t have a problem being mothers first. Most woman have a natural instinct to want to have and nurture children. There is nothing wrong with that. But that is what the author is suggesting.
You are sassy aren’t you? 🙂
Bet’cha
Leave it to the French 🙂
An interesting take on things. I can’t say I agree with the author, but then again, if it dissuades people from jumping in only to become bad parents… Then maybe it’s not such a bad thing?
I think it’s important for people to think about what they’re getting in to before doing it. If you can read a book like this or even just go through the list and still shrug it off and say it doesn’t matter because you want to bring a life into this world, then all the better! At least you know they’re dedicated and will probably accept the challenge of being a good parent.
Touché. Good point.
[…] Idiot news of the century (I really believe it and consider that every day news give us a lot of possibilities): French author Corinne Maier has written a book called No Kid: 40 Reasons Not to Have Children […]
Hey, hey, enough with the “selfish” talk. I don’t want kids, but I want kids in my life. I just have NO maternal instinct. None. I look at babies and don’t think “cute,” I think, “Why did someone put an extra from the X-files into a carriage?”
So I’m not going to be a parent for the same reason I’m not going to be a teacher: there are other people who like it more and would be better at it. Doesn’t mean I would kill my child if I got pregnant, and it certainly doesn’t mean that I don’t want to have children in my life (I’m assuming that parents would be thrilled to have a night to themselves and let their kid play with Aunt Chocolate-Lover.)
Rant over. 🙂
he will hate it if you bring someone he’s never met back for the night
So get married before you procreate and don’t screw around with random men.
Can’t take your kids to a museum? I didn’t know that. I have memories (fond ones, really) of going to the Met as young as four; of going to the symphony as a young girl; of going out for fancy dinners before I was in elementary school. It’s just a matter of teaching your children to do behave like minature adults and planning the events. Heck, I take my little siblings to the Museum of Science all the time – they think it’s a blast.
“Instead of that I am forced to stay at home, to serve meals, to get up at 7am every day, to go over idiotic lessons, and to put the washing machine on. All that for two children who treat me like their maidservant. Certain days I regret having had them – and I dare to say it.”
Errr… your children are teenagers. Make them help with dinner, laundry, and the household tasks. You will be saner; they will be more responsible; and their future spouses will praise you to the skies. Don’t regret their existence!
Theobromophile, don’t sell yourself short – you’d make a way better mother than most of these selfish people!
Neil, thank you! Two issues, though:
1. stated lack of maternal instinct; and
2. weird traditional values whereby I think that children should be brought up in two-parent households, not with selfish single mothers. 😉
I think her reasons are designed to be shocking and are a bit tongue in cheek and are meant to lampoon the way that the French state has deified and glorified motherhood here in France. She just comes off as selfish in the end. But, to me her idea of not having children is correct. There are already too many people on the planet and it is clearly in serious trouble. But – how do you keep the dumb people from breeding if only the smart ones realize that over-population is a problem that will cause us all to die due to global warming and starvation if we continue our population expansion exponentially as predicted and outstrip our ability to produce food and house people properly? There’s the rub …. you would end up with an ever dumber population …
Thanks for stopping by Musings.
I think the book is supposed to make outlandish statements too, but she’s also very sincere in her views (meant mostly for French readers).
I’d likely take issue with your view on over-population. I’ve seen studies both ways. It’s my understanding that Western Europe is a bit more crammed than say, parts of Russia, Africa, or North America. I live in the middle of the the U.S. and believe me, there’s plenty of room for population growth in this area. So, I guess I don’t really think about it as much as some people.
I have a sign in my kitchen that says “we had to get rid of the kids, the cat was allergic”. :)))
I do not have maternal instinct, nor I like children. So……. I won’t have any.
I don’t see any prob with this. There are thousand of other things to do and to experience in life!
Thank you for your thoughts Cristina.
I know some people are not cut out to have and properly raise children. But when cultures actually begin to espouse philosophies that raising the next generation is not worth the effort, then I begin to worry. There is something significant and special about passing on a legacy and equipping kids to be prepared for the future and to be successful in life. Even if you do not want children of your own, I would hope that you still might take the opportunity to volunteer to help kids through mentoring programs, etc.